


For King and Country

by elemie89



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Alternate Universe - American Revolution, Alternate Universe - Historical, Arranged Marriage, Eventual Romance, Eventual Smut, F/M, Historical, Historical References, Rey and Poe are related, Slow Burn
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-03-12
Updated: 2019-08-16
Packaged: 2019-11-15 22:21:09
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 13,478
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18082001
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/elemie89/pseuds/elemie89
Summary: 1776, New York. Aurora "Rey" Dameron has been entered into an arranged marriage with Colonel Ben Solo. Just one problem, he's an officer in the British Army and she's recently discovered the Patriot cause.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I am a history nerd of the highest order. I had to write an American Revolution AU. Here it is. 
> 
> Many thanks to JenfysNest for the beta <3

The evening summer sun was beginning to make its descent below the Long Island Sound, casting the dark blue waters in shades of red, yellow and orange. Aurora Dameron breathed in the smell of honeysuckle as she placed her quilt on the grass. She was happy for the tranquil scene as she pushed a stray lock of her chestnut hair behind her ear. The revolution had formally started almost one month prior. Rumors of war and battle swirled around them, but it hadn’t touched Dameron House. 

 

She flicked her head back toward the main house to ensure she was alone and safely away from the watchful eye of her brother, Poe. Reaching in her petticoat, she pulled out a copy of  _ Common Sense _ by Thomas Paine. She knew the treasonous pamphlet she held could land her in trouble not just with her elder brother, but with the Crown as well. She’d read about this pamphlet in the paper a little over two months ago. It was radical, antithetical to King George, and would anger her brother, therefore she needed to have it. On her last trip into New York City for a dress fitting, she’d slipped her brother’s servants and purchased it. 

 

Paine’s theories on government, tyranny, and how all men are created equal before God stirred something in her. It had begun as a simple act of rebellion against her brother, but it opened the door to something much larger. Aurora cringed as she ran her fingers along the paper, hearing her late mother Shara’s words in her ear. If she could see Rey (as she was affectionately called by her family) reading and entertaining such radical ideas, she’d launch into a tirade about how women shouldn’t even be reading—that was men’s work. She hadn’t even considered herself a revolutionary until now, but reading the words, Rey thought she just might be. 

 

Her quiet evening reading was interrupted by a voice calling her from the main house. She turned her head to see Finn—one of her brother’s house staff. His title was in name only. He was as much an equal member of the household as Poe or Rey. 

 

“Poe would like a word,” Finn called to her, standing at the rear entrance. 

 

She sighed and hid the pamphlet away once more. She gathered up the quilt and trudged toward the house. 

 

“Where might I find my brother?” she asked as she drew closer Finn. 

 

He nodded in the direction of the hallway in the house. “His study.” 

 

Rey wiped some grass and dirt off her skirt before entering the house, not wanting to add that to the list of transgressions her brother would surely gripe about. Her boots clacked along the wooden floors of the hallway. She passed several portraits of her ancestors as she walked—feeling as though she were being judged by them. Rey reached the entryway of Poe’s study. He was at his desk, talking very animatedly with his wife, Kaydel. They were clearly engrossed in an argument of some sort, which was not an uncommon occurrence for the pair. Rey saw this as her chance to escape and avoid a conversation with her brother. Rey wasn’t so lucky. As she moved to back away, a board creaked, drawing the attention of Poe and Kaydel. Kaydel huffed, gathered her skirt and exited the room.  

 

Poe regained his composure and motioned to a chair in front of his desk. “Please sit.” 

 

Rey did as he instructed. “Missed you at dinner, brother. Long day settling property disputes?” 

 

He paused before answering. “I was negotiating your dowry.” 

 

Rey wanted to make some noise of annoyance or protest, but she knew this conversation was long overdue. At nineteen, Rey had seen most of the young women her age married off. Rey assumed one day Poe would be coming to her with the news that he’d negotiated a marriage for her. 

 

“Who’s the lucky bastard?” Rey questioned, hoping her jab at her future husband would convey her feelings on the matter to Poe. 

 

Only offering her a glare for her insult, he continued. “Colonel Ben Solo.”

 

“An army man?” she asked incredulously. 

 

Poe simply nodded in response. 

 

To his credit, Poe had maintained neutrality regarding the ever-changing political landscape, both in and outside his home. From what Rey could understand, he ruled on the merits of his cases rather than the politics of the parties involved. Poe was fair. That was one thing she admired about him. Rey knew times were perilous and mentioning the wrong opinion to the wrong person could have dire consequences. However, with this arrangement Poe had firmly planted Dameron House’s flag in the camp of the king. She couldn’t understand why Poe had made such a match, given all his talk of neutrality.  

 

Rey only knew of Colonel Ben Solo by reputation. He lived in New York City and—according to her friends Rose and Paige Tico—he was arguably the most eligible bachelor a girl from a family with means could want. None of this mattered though. Rey knew, despite all the reasons this was a good match, she wanted no part of this. He was a Redcoat and loyal to King George. She’d never met Colonel Solo, but she hated this arrangement already. 

 

“It’s a fine match,” Poe offered. 

 

“What are  _ you _ getting from this?” Rey probed. She was no fool. Poe was going to attempt to make sure this deal benefited him in some way too. 

 

“I’ve ensured Colonel Solo’s regiment doesn’t camp here for the duration of the war,” Poe explained. 

 

“Ah,” Rey nodded. “So it’s settled, then?” 

 

Poe nodded. Awkward silence descended upon the room. Rey decided it was time to leave and go back to her needlepoint or whatever was expected of her now. 

 

“Rey,” Poe began, interrupting her movements. “You knew this day was coming.” 

 

“Does not mean I have to agree with it,” Rey shot back. 

 

“Rey,” Finn chimed in with a reassuring tone. He had apparently come to the entranceway of the study at some point during their conversation. 

 

“E tu, Finn? I should think the two of you would have a bit more sympathy for a woman in my situation, given your...proclivities,” she said throwing a glance at both men. 

 

Poe had risen to stand at some point. He shifted uncomfortably as he cast a glance at Finn. “I am sorry Rey, but this is how it has to be.” 

 

“I’m sure you are,” Rey glared at her brother. “So, when do I meet my husband?” 

 

“He’s arriving tomorrow for dinner,” Poe began. 

 

“But I just bathed two days ago!” Rey interjected. 

 

Poe threw up a hand to silence her. “He’s staying a few days and then you’re heading to the city to be married at his family home.” 

 

Rey knew that was it on the matter. Contracts had already been negotiated and dowry’s handed over. There was no backing out now without bringing shame on the Dameron name. She turned on her heel wordlessly and retired to the parlor. 

  
  


***

 

The next afternoon, Rey began preparations for Colonel Solo’s arrival for dinner. Her best dress was pulled out, her hair brushed and pinned up—all to prepare herself for the mysterious Colonel Solo who was coming to whisk her away in matrimonial bliss. 

 

As she prepared, Rey tried not to think fatalistic thoughts about the situation, but it was proving a difficult task. At best, Rey could hope for an amicable marriage, filled with companionable silence, occasional chatter about the state of the weather over dinner, and organizing society parties. All this would be punctuated with the occasional night spent together in hopes of furthering the family line. At worst, it could be the culmination of all the horror stories of how husbands treated their brides—the stories everyone talked about in hushed tones, but no one ever did anything about. 

 

Rey was finished preparing herself, with help from a servant younger than her. She descended the stairs and the house was a scene of chaos with the remaining servants overseeing final preparations. Floors were being swept, portraits dusted, and the kitchen was a hive of activity with Finn overseeing the cooking of dinner. 

 

Rey went into the parlor and busied herself with a book. From the window she could see a stable boy running up the gravel path from the main road. The breathless boy was most likely heralding the arrival of Rey’s intended. She placed the book down on a small table next to her chair, gathered her skirt and made her way to the front door. A horse and carriage crunched the gravel underneath them as they approached. Rey’s stomach churned in knots as it came to a halt in front of the house. Rey waited for what seemed like an eternity for the door to open and to lay eyes on her husband for the first time. As the carriage door slowly opened, Rey knew war had just been invited into the Dameron house for dinner.

  
  



	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> welcome back guys! thanks for your patience between updates. hope the wait is worth it! 
> 
> as always, thanks to [JenfysNest](https://archiveofourown.org/users/JenfysNest) for beta-ing this chapter. also, a special shout out to Audrey4ever for her help on this chapter. 
> 
> Also, I realized last chapter I forgot to include some notes about historical references I included. I'll be doing that from now on.

Colonel Ben Solo was happy being a confirmed bachelor, but as the son of nobility, he knew this day was coming. Unlike his mother, Lady Leia Organa, marrying for love was not in his future.The only women he’d ever encountered in his life were high-born ladies who would forget their place and throw themselves at him because of his name and title. One thing he didn’t plan on, however, was arranging this contract himself.

 

Ever since all this foolishness with talk of rebellion had begun, his mother had firmly established herself as a known rebel sympathizer. As an officer in the King’s army, this put Ben and his mother at odds. They couldn’t have a simple conversation over dinner without it devolving into a political debate. It had been months since they’d last corresponded. Leia had moved to the family home in Boston and Ben took over Solo House in New York. It was better this way, Ben reminded himself. 

 

There were more important matters to focus on than the dissolution of his family, however. The winds of rebellion were blowing. The Declaration of Independence from Philadelphia meant Ben would be called into action soon. General Snoke’s correspondence had increased in frequency and Ben knew it was just a matter of time before he would reluctantly leave the safety of his home and join the fray. 

 

Amidst all the correspondence from General Snoke, Ben had received a letter from Magistrate Poe Dameron seeking to arrange a marriage for his sister, Aurora. Receiving that letter threw Ben’s life into sharp relief. At thirty, he had devoted most of his life to military service (although his expertise wasn’t needed until the last few months). After the rebellion was snuffed out, he had plans of retiring to civilian life and purchasing land in the colony of Virginia. What good would land be without heirs to bequeath it to? 

 

The Dameron family was a good family, well established on Long Island. Ben knew he’d be a fool to decline. Poe Dameron’s only request was that the land belonging to Dameron House not be used to house British troops during the war. Ben had to concede it was a fair request and presented it to General Snoke, who agreed to the terms. Contracts were drawn up and Ben made preparations to meet his new bride. 

 

The full weight of what he was going to do finally hit him as he was being fitted for a new outfit to travel to Long Island. A strange thought entered his mind, unbidden—what if he didn’t  _ like _ this Aurora?. Ultimately, he didn’t have to like her and she didn’t have to like him. That wasn’t the point of this whole arrangement. They just needed to tolerate each other, right? Yet, Ben couldn’t understand why he was fretting over if this Aurora was beautiful or not. He hadn’t even seen a portrait of her yet. 

 

Ben never imagined he’d find himself in this situation. Matters of the heart were not his expertise. Put him in front of his battalion and he was in total control. An arranged marriage, however, he had no control over and it made him uneasy. He urged himself to collect his errant thoughts and attributed his anxieties to the unknown of it all. 

 

***

 

The carriage door swung open in front of Dameron House weeks later and Ben stepped out. His eyes fell upon a man he recognized from portraits as Poe Dameron. He was flanked by a woman in a dark green dress with chestnut hair who stood about half a foot shorter than him. She was scowling at him with her arms crossed.  _ Well so much for actually liking each other _ , he lamented. 

 

He cleared his throat and turned to Poe, with an extended hand. “Lord Dameron, pleasure to meet you.” 

 

“And you as well, Colonel Solo,” Poe replied, returning his gesture. “This is my sister, Aurora Dameron.” 

 

Ben nodded his head in greeting. “Pleasure to meet you Miss Aurora.”

 

Rey returned the nod demurely, but there was no civility behind it. She flicked her eyes down to the ground and averted his gaze.  _ This is going well _ , Ben sighed. 

 

A few seconds of silence—save for the sounds of nature—stretched over the scene. 

 

“Shall we head inside? My staff is nearly through with dinner,” Poe gestured toward the open door. “I trust you’re hungry after your journey?” 

 

“Thank you,” Ben said, gratefully. He was tired and hungry after his half-day journey. 

 

They entered the dining room. The mood between Ben and his intended didn’t improve at all. Ben took a seat and it was not lost on him that Rey took note of where he sat, opting to sit on the opposite side of the table. The food was served and silence reigned over the table. 

 

“So, I’ve heard you like to read,” Ben said after a few bites of food, attempting to initiate some conversation between them.  

 

Rey simply nodded in reply. 

 

Ben worked his jaw, annoyance with his inability to get anywhere beginning to seep under his skin. He wondered what he’d done to deserve such a reception. He tried yet again to initiate conversation. “Your brother also tells me you’re an accomplished horse rider.” 

 

Rey shoveled a fork full of food in her mouth and shrugged. 

 

“We should ride horses together before we go back to New York City,” Ben offered. 

 

Rey shrugged yet again. Ben was on the verge of giving up. “Perhaps some other time.” 

 

“When there’s not a war to fight,” Rey muttered. Ben gathered that Rey thought she had said those words low enough for no one to hear, but Ben heard them. 

 

“Aurora,” Poe warned. 

 

She simply scowled at him, not heeding his warning. “It’s happening one way or the other, brother.” 

 

“Miss Dameron, my battalion is trying to prevent further bloodshed,” Ben offered evenly. “Have you been to Boston? I have, it’s a bloodbath.”

 

“They’re fighting for freedom!” Rey slammed her hands on the table. 

 

“You mean the murderers, traitors and thieves whose ideas you espouse?” 

 

Kaydel slammed her hands down on the table, silencing the argument between the two. “Did everyone enjoy the meat pie?” 

 

Poe, Rey and Ben looked at the normally demure Kaydel dumbstruck for a few seconds. Ben cleared his throat. “Um, it was quite good.” 

 

“I’m glad you enjoyed it. It’s one of Rey’s favorites. She did everything but cook the dinner this evening,” Kaydel said, attempting to divert the heated tensions. 

 

“Game pie is one of my favorite meals as well, Rey,” Ben said, meeting Rey’s gaze, in an effort to restore some civility between them. 

 

“You may call me Aurora or Miss Dameron and the colonies wouldn’t be in this position if we could just self-govern,” Rey groused, pushing scraps of her dinner around. 

 

“Aurora!” Poe roared from the head of the table. “Forgive me Colonel Solo, my sister forgets herself yet again. Aurora, excuse yourself.  _ Now _ .” 

 

Rey pushed her chair away from the table and threw her napkin down. Poe glared at her as she walked away from the table. “Meet us in the parlor.” 

 

When Rey was out of earshot, Poe spoke. “I beg your forgiveness Colonel Solo. My sister is young and intemperate.” 

 

Ben knew this apology was most likely for the sake of maintaining the arrangement, however sincere he appeared. Still, there was something about Aurora that he’d never seen in the women he’d been around before—a fire, a passion inside. He waved the other man off. “It’s nothing.” 

 

Poe nodded in understanding. “Shall we retire to the parlor?” 

 

Ben nodded, pushed his chair back and followed Poe. Rey was seated at the piano, playing one-handed. 

 

“Do you play, Miss Aurora?” Ben asked, announcing his arrival into the room. 

 

Rey nodded, eyes still transfixed on the sheet music in front of her. 

 

“Aurora,” Poe called from behind Ben. “Why don’t you sing something for Colonel Solo?”

 

Rey sighed and set her hands to the piano keys. Poe moved over to a decanter sitting on a bookshelf. He poured the amber liquid into two glasses, offering one to Ben.

 

“Cider?” Ben asked with a quirked eyebrow. 

 

Poe leaned in, as if about to reveal some great mystery of the universe. “Rum. You’re not going to report me to the crown, eh, Solo?” 

 

Ben smirked—the first time he’d smiled today. “Your secret is safe with me, Lord Dameron.” 

 

He sipped the drink as Rey sang and played piano. Her melodious voice filled the parlor as she deftly played the piano. Ben recognized the tune from somewhere, but he couldn’t place it. However, that changed as Rey sang the next two stanzas. 

 

_ John did place her on her steed _

_ ll-e-o-lay and a lullay gay, _

_ John did place her on her steed _

_ Ere he did the cruel deed. _

_ ll-e-o-lay and a lullay gay, _

 

_ 'Kiss me, Sister, ere you part.' _

_ ll-e-o-lay and a lullay gay, _

_ 'Kiss me, Sister, ere you part.' _

_ As he kissed,  _ **_she_ ** _ stabbed  _ **_his_ ** _ heart. _

_ ll-e-o-lay and a lullay gay _

 

Poe nearly choked on his drink as Rey changed the lyrics in the second to last line. The song, entitled “Brother’s Revenge”, told the story of a man who killed his sister. Ben felt a slight twinge of guilt as a laugh threatened to escape his body. He stifled it with another sip of his drink. 

 

Poe regained his composure. “That’s enough. Thank you, Rey.”

 

Rey nodded and excused herself from the parlor. Ben noted Rey seemed very pleased with her efforts this evening. Ben knew on some level that he was supposed to be pushed away by her behavior this evening. However, something strange was occuring in Ben’s mind. He was strangely intrigued by Miss Dameron. Despite being on opposite sides of the brewing conflict, there was a fiery passion inside her and Ben was drawn to it like a moth to the flame.  

 

***

 

Three days later, Rey was in New York City. Rey had always been enthralled with the hustle and bustle of it all since she was a child. One good thing, she supposed, about the whole arrangement with Colonel Solo was that she lived here now. There was happenings on every corner. On this particular day, a man was standing on a wooden crate, speaking animatedly. Words like “freedom,” “liberty,” and “self-governance” came from his mouth. Rey was drawn to it instantly. She needed to be a part of that crowd.

 

However, she needed to go through the motions of getting fitted for a dress first, accompanied by Colonel Solo’s personal secretary, Dopheld Mitaka. She almost felt sorry for the man having to sit in a shop for hours. A few hours of dress drudgery had passed and they left to head back to Colonel Solo’s mansion near Harlem. Rey cringed at the thought of staying cooped up in that house for God knew how long. Before she left the dress shop, she had already formulated a plan to ditch Mitaka. She had a particular knack for ditching people in this city.    

 

When they left the shop, Rey let Mitaka walk in front of her. She slowed down as they came to an alleyway. Mitaka kept walking straight, Rey turned down the alley. She waited a few seconds and peeked out from the alley. Ensuring she was alone, she turned back in the direction of the dress shop and toward the crowd of like-minded individuals. 

 

She stood on the fringes and absorbed every word. Rey had little exposure to these ideas other than reading  _ Common Sense _ cover to cover. However, seeing this man—whoever he was—invigorated and impassioned about these ideas kindled the fire already burning in Rey. Truth be told, she had never felt this way about anything. This was a new and fresh idea. Between hearing this man speak and reading Paine’s words, Rey knew this was something to believe in. 

 

Rey was also enthralled by the gathered crowd. Poe had lead her to believe these ideas weren’t popular and could lead to imprisonment or death. However, these people were discussing these ideas openly. It was equally liberating and thrilling. 

 

She was about to make her way to the man who had just finished speaking, who now had a smaller crowd gathered around him. Poe and her future husband would most certainly disapprove of this action. This hastened her steps and quickened her pulse. She had nearly reached her destination when a firm hand gripped her arm and steered her away. 

 

“Let go!” she yelled before she could see who was pulling her away. She looked up and groaned. It was Colonel Solo. 

 

He didn’t loosen his grip. He only guided her out of the crowd into a less populous area, only daring to speak once they couldn’t be overheard easily. 

 

Rey wriggled out of his grasp. “What was that?!” 

 

“What was that?” Ben asked. “You can’t be seen there Miss Dameron.” 

 

Rey crossed her arms. “Why not?” 

 

“Are you really this dense or just naive? Perhaps both?” Ben nearly growled. 

 

“Look around, Colonel Solo. This is history,” she began. She pressed a finger to his chest. “And you’re going to be on the wrong side of it.” 

 

Ben sighed. “You really don’t get it.”

 

“What on earth are you talking about?” Rey asked. 

  
“I’m trying to keep you  _ alive _ ,” Ben replied, placing more emphasis than necessary on the last word. He gripped her arm again and steered her toward his home. “Now  **let’s go** .” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The song Rey sings in this chapter is actually a real song -- [Brother's Revenge](http://www.contemplator.com/child/revenge.html)
> 
> [My Twitter](https://twitter.com/em_is_writing)


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thank you all for reading this humble tale! I'm blown away by the response to this and I'm eternally grateful! 
> 
> as always, thank you to my beta JenfysNest for her assistance.

Lying was a sin. That much had been drilled into Rey for as long as she could remember. The Eighth Commandment was a principle Rey lived her life by for that very reason. It was also practical advice for living. Being truthful in all matters saves you from ethical dilemmas and, in Rey’s case, weeded out people who couldn’t take her honesty. 

 

Lying was a sin. Lying before God—Rey assumed—would earn one a quick ticket to Hell. Yet here she was, standing before God and witnesses, lying. She had just been escorted into the great room of Organa Manor, Ben’s family home in New York City, by Poe. She’d spent the morning being fussed over by well-meaning servants before the walk down the aisle toward her new husband. Minister Lor San Tekka was presiding over the wedding. The older man offered her a warm, congenial smile as she walked toward the front of the room. Colonel Solo was dressed in his Army Uniform. He was more nervous than Rey had ever seen him. Rey thought this served him right for agreeing to this arrangement in the first place. 

 

She studied his face (what else was she supposed to do?) as Minister San Tekka welcomed the guests and offered a few words about God’s design for marriage. Rey supposed her new husband wasn’t completely unfortunate looking. His angular jaw and prominent nose looked more at home among some of the sketches of Renaissance sculptures Rey had seen. Rey concluded in short order (on her wedding day, no less) that he was pleasing to look at. This was particularly vexing. Rey wanted to hate him. He—along with half of the assembled guests of the male persuasion—were dressed in red, a color that was antithetical to all Rey held dear. 

 

She tried to keep this upmost in her mind as she stood across from him. 

 

“Will you have this man to be your wedded husband, to live together in the holy Estate of Matrimony? Will you obey him, serve him, love, honor and keep him in sickness and in health, and forsaking all others, for as long as you both shall live?” 

 

Rey sucked in a breath and prepared to be struck down by lightning for the lie she was about to utter. “I will.” 

 

Ben promised the same to Rey and—much to Rey’s chagrin—he wasn’t struck down either. 

 

“With this ring, I thee wed, with my body I thee worship, and with all my worldly goods, I thee endow…” she heard him begin as he slipped a ring on her finger. Her smaller hand was nearly swallowed by his as they performed this act. Rey was inexplicably entranced by this. 

 

The new Colonel and Mrs. Solo were introduced to the crowd and the merriment began. However, there was no joy in Rey’s heart. She didn’t love her new husband and she was certain he didn’t love her. 

 

All Rey really wanted to do now was sit at the head banquet table and drink wine. However, that was not going to happen. This was a society wedding and Rey was expected to mingle and greet her guests like the Lady (she supposed that was her title now) she was. After partaking of some of the food, her new husband held out his hand so they could thank their guests. 

 

Rey pursed her lips and took his hand. They began to walk around the room. 

 

“Colonel Solo,” a voice from behind them called. Rey didn’t know who the voice belonged to but it made her blood run cold. 

 

“General Snoke,” Ben replied with a deferential nod. 

 

Rey didn’t pay attention to the pleasantries exchanged. Instead, she scoured the nearby table for the nearest sharp object she could to plunge in to General Snoke’s chest. A wound there would match the scars on his face allegedly sustained from fighting in the French and Indian War. His piercing blue eyes bored into Rey as he offered congratulations on their union, but Rey only nodded tepidly in response. 

 

General Snoke had garnered a reputation during the French and Indian war for his brutal battle tactics and even harsher treatment of war prisoners. Word of his cruelty allegedly reached England all the way to King George, but no one was inclined to dole out punishment. 

 

A pale ginger with a scowl on his face came to stand alongside General Snoke. 

 

Not turning his face, but sensing his presence, Snoke said, “Yes, what is it, Armitage?” 

 

“General Snoke, sir, I have word on rebel troop movements,” the man began. 

 

General Snoke cut him off with a condescending laugh. “Tsk. Tsk. On your superior’s wedding day, Commander Hux?” 

 

Hux turned a shade of red to match his hair and straightened as stiff as a rod. 

 

“Eat. Drink. Be merry. Tomorrow we fight,” Snoke gestured to the party around him. 

 

“Very well, General,” Hux nodded, then turned to regard Colonel Solo. He raised his glass to toast to them and walked away wordlessly. At that moment Rey decided her new husband was now her favorite Redcoat she’d ever met, which wasn’t saying much. 

 

***

  
  


The party had died down. The guests had all left. Rey was now standing in front of a mirror, clad in nothing but a nightgown, brushing her hair after undoing the pins and jewels. She knew she was standing in what was now her bedroom, but she still felt like an intruder, like she didn’t belong. Rey also knew what was expected of her tonight and knew she was not ready or willing. 

 

The creaking of the floorboards announced Colonel Solo’s arrival into the bedroom. He wordlessly regarded her and took a spot on the bed. Rey placed her brush down a little slower than she normally would have, not wanting to risk her hands beginning to shake. She suddenly felt on edge with the charged atmosphere in the room. 

 

Attempting to portray a calm exterior, Rey sauntered over to the bed, laid down and turned away from Colonel Solo. 

 

“So, this is how tonight is going to go,” Colonel Solo muttered. 

 

Rey flipped over in the bed. “Was there any doubt?” 

 

A mischievous glimmer entered Colonel Solo’s eyes that irked Rey. “I had a little bit of hope.” 

 

Rey smirked. “Then you’re a fool.” 

 

“A fool?” he asked with a quirked eyebrow. “You married me. What does that say about you?” 

 

“An arrangement concocted by my brother, need I remind you,” she shot back, sitting straight up in bed. 

 

“Yes, because I’m sure with your disposition, there were boys lined up asking for your hand?” Ben asked. Rey knew he was trying to get a rise out of her and it was working. 

 

Rey huffed. “I don’t need a boy.” 

 

“Correct, my wife,” Ben began. “You need a man. Someone who can actually take care of you.” 

 

“And I supposed you think you’re the one to do all that?” 

 

He shrugged. “Your words.” 

 

Rey didn’t know how to explain what happened next. She would say she temporarily lost control of her body. Regardless of the reasons why, she balled her fist and took a swing at her husband. 

 

“Fascinating,” Ben hummed as he held her wrist like it was nothing. “You respond not to civility, but dominance from me.” 

 

Rey’s only response was to move her other fist to strike at him. Ben simply grabbed her other wrist as deftly as swatting a fly. Rey knew she should be furious that Ben was holding her like this, but she wasn’t. A strange heat was gathering inside her that she’d never felt before. She didn’t know at what point she had gotten on her knees on the bed, with Ben in the same position, but here she was. 

 

Her breath hitched. What was happening to her? Here she was, inches from the face of man she loathed, yet couldn’t stop staring into his deep brown eyes. Her own eyes also flitted to his plush lips, with her errant thoughts wondering how they would taste if she kissed him.

 

Rey had kissed a boy before. She was fourteen and the boy had taken her by surprise. He was the son of her late father’s friend who had taken a liking to her during a summer he’d spent with her family. The boy earned a broken nose courtesy of Rey’s fist for his efforts. This, however, was entirely different. 

 

Ben certainly wasn’t a gangly, pimpled teenager. He was all man, holding her wrists pressed to her sides, the distance between their faces closing, tempting her to kiss him. She knew she shouldn’t. She hated him. 

 

Yet the taste of his lips proved too great a temptation for Rey. She closed the space between them and met his lips in a kiss. Colonel Solo seemed taken aback by her gesture at first, releasing her arms and sliding his own around her waist. He lowered her to the bed. 

 

When the boy kissed Rey years ago, she felt nothing except disgust. Not so with her new husband. Every new touch from Ben awakened something in Rey she didn’t know existed. These new sensations, while entirely foreign, were not unwelcome. 

 

Ben swiped his tongue into Rey’s mouth. He slid his hands up her side and one came to cup her clothed breast. Through the thin fabric of her nightgown, he swirled his thumb over her nipple. Rey moaned into the kiss, sliding her hands under his sleeping shirt, feeling his muscles twitch under the weight of her touch. She was wrong about him. It wasn’t just his face, but his entire body that could have been carved by the finest sculptors in Italy. 

 

She almost forgot herself in this moment. Then her eyes flew open and she remembered just exactly whose bed she was in. 

 

“Stop!” she yelled, pushing him away. A moment of regret entered her mind, not for the loss of contact, but she was now acutely aware she didn’t know how Colonel Solo would react. Women had been struck for much less than what Rey had just done. 

 

He complied, much to her surprise, and got out of the bed. They regarded each other for a few seconds, their breath ragged and lips swollen. Rey was prepared for her and Colonel Solo to exchange words yet again. She was resolute and prepared to defend her actions. However, her impromptu defense was not needed. She opened her mouth to speak, but Colonel Solo threw up a hand to stop her. 

 

“You may have the room tonight,” he said, averting his eyes toward the floor. 

 

Rey opened her mouth to speak again and once again, Colonel Solo cut her off. “Goodnight, wife.” 

 

Rey was rendered speechless as he walked out of the room and shut the door. When she spoke, it was barely above a whisper. “Goodnight, husband.”

  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Want to know what Rey's wedding dress might have looked like? [Here!](http://www.antiquedress.com/item9286.htm)
> 
> More about colonial weddings [here](https://livesandlegaciesblog.org/2015/10/06/a-colonial-wedding/).


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We're back with another installment! Thank you for your patience with me and I hope it will be rewarded. As always, thanks to my amazing beta, [JenfysNest](https://archiveofourown.org/users/JenfysNest) for the quick turnaround. 
> 
> Enjoy <3

Ben Solo had never been particularly religious in his life before, but today he was grateful for his Sunday ritual of attending a service. It meant he could actually spend more than ten minutes in the company of his wife. It had been a week since his wedding night and an awkward mood had descended on Organa Manor. He’d only spoken with Rey over dinner and it was mainly a comment on the weather or housekeeping items. He didn’t know why it was so important that he converse with his wife, but he was glad the homily could provide a new topic of conversation. 

Rey descended the stairs that morning for breakfast, with a deferential nod in his general direction. This was how it was now, ever since their wedding night. She hadn’t displayed the same fire she’d show him when they first met. Ben couldn’t explain it, but he much preferred that Rey to this semi-mute woman now living in his house. 

Over breakfast, they exchanged their few customary comments on the weather. Aurora informed him that the servants needed money for their trip to the market the next day, Ben replied he would see to it. A servant came to pour some tea, first for Ben, then moved over to Aurora. 

“I will take no tea, thank you,” she said politely, yet firmly. 

The servant bowed and retreated to the kitchen. Rey let out a shaky breath and wiped her forehead. Ben hadn’t noticed before, but he now noted Rey looked a little paler than usual. 

“Are you alright, wife?” Ben asked.

Rey simply nodded in response. A wicked thought flashed across Ben’s mind. Drinking tea was sure to get a rise out of his wife. He swirled his spoon in his saucer and shot her a glance before raising his cup to his mouth. He sipped it with more enthusiasm than normal. Rey had now set her fork down and was glaring at him. Her nostrils were flaring slightly. 

“This tea is exceptionally good today,” Ben stated casually. 

He gave a careful glance at her again. Her jaw was now stiffened and her breathing was harder. He took another sip of tea. She finally slammed her hands down on the table. 

“If you’ll excuse me,” she said, placing her napkin down on the table. “I’ll be in the drawing room. Fetch me when you’re ready to leave for church.” 

When she’d left the room, Ben allowed a chuckle of satisfaction to escape from his body. He wasn’t sure whether he should be ashamed or amused that he’d gotten a rise from his wife, but he could start to see the Aurora that he’d first met beginning to peek back through.   
Minutes later, it was time for the couple to head out to service. Ben helped his wife into his buggy and they made the short trip. 

Church of the King was less than a ten minute buggy ride from Organa Manor. It was a modest, unassuming white building with a steeple and cross atop of the church. It could seat forty people comfortably each Sunday. Minister Lor San Tekka was the pastor there. As the Solo’s approached the building, Minister San Tekka stood at the entrance in his black Anglican robes, greeting his congregants. 

The Solo’s regarded him with a nod. Aurora removed her straw hat as she entered the building and they took their customary seats in the middle of the church. Ben turned to his bride to say something, but she had picked up a Bible from the back of the pew and was either reading it or pretending to read it just to spite him. 

Armitage Hux entered with his wife, Brienne Phasma Hux, and they took a seat across the aisle from Ben and Aurora. The Solo’s and the Hux’s regarded each other with a nod. General Snoke was usually in attendance, but Ben didn’t see him. He assumed the general was probably called away for a campaign or some such business. 

It wasn’t long after that, Minister San Tekka greeted the worshipers. They sang a few hymns, then Minister San Tekka ascended the stairs to the pulpit. 

“Brothers and sisters in Christ,” he began. “Our reading today, comes from Psalm chapter seventy-six, verse ten: Surely the wrath of man shall praise thee; the remainder of wrath shalt thou restrain. What the Psalmist is trying to impart to us is this, any situation that you are presently engrossed in, can and will be used to the glory of God.” 

Good. This is good, Ben thought. This will be an excellent topic of conversation with Aurora. 

“Whether it’s through infirmities, the Lord surely works,” the minister continued. He paused and his eyes were locked on Ben and a few army officers who were sitting in front of him. “Even through the tyranny of kings and the scourge of war, the Lord is surely present and working.” 

The congregants stirred at his words. Ben darted his eyes around. Rey was sitting up straight in rapt attention. Ben knew he needed to get out of the church and fast. He couldn’t be seen here, nor could his new wife be seen entertaining dangerous ideas. 

Colonel Solo shouldn’t have been surprised that San Tekka would be sympathetic toward the rebel cause. He’d been involved—or rumored to be involved—in the Jacobite Revolution in his homeland of Scotland. Rabble rousing was in his nature. Ben saw a few of the congregants getting up to leave as Minister San Tekka kept preaching. He grabbed Aurora’s arm. 

“We’re leaving,” he stated in no uncertain terms, standing up. 

“But,” she protested. 

“No,” he said even firmer than his first statement. 

Out of the corner of his eye, he saw Hux standing to leave with his own wife on his arm. Hux was regarding the Solo’s with a quirked eyebrow. Ben closed his eyes, sighed, and sent up a silent prayer that his headstrong wife would drop her stubborn attitude for long enough to see he was right. 

His prayers were answered when she rolled her eyes and stood up. He knew she would let him hear it for pulling her out of the church, but at least she would be alive. The buggy ride back to the manor was unbearable. Rey was shooting daggers with her eyes. Ben didn’t care. She was alive. 

They arrived at the manor. Rey didn’t take his hand getting out of the buggy and just huffed past him. 

Ben hadn’t planned on speaking first, but when she began to storm up the stairs, he couldn’t hold his tongue any longer. 

“Do you have a death wish?” He called after Rey. 

She stopped dead in her tracks. Her shoulders tensed and she turned around. “Do you have a problem with a woman who has her own ideas?” 

Ben balked at the suggestion. “I don’t. Need I remind you, I was raised by a woman with a very strong point of view.” 

“That’s the simplest explanation for dragging me out of that church!” Rey shot back. 

“No, the simplest explanation is I’m trying to keep you alive and out of prison. If word got back to General Snoke that we had both stayed and listened? I would be in prison and headed to the gallows before sunset,” Ben drew closer to Rey.

“You’re being quite dramatic, husband,” she replied, rolling her eyes. “No one will run to General Snoke and gossip about his prized Colonel.” 

“Aurora, this is New York City. There are always people who will gossip.” 

No sooner had he said that, she turned to go up the stairs once more. 

“Aurora, this isn’t just university students shouting in the square and writing pamphlets,” he began. “You don’t know the real cost. I was at Lexington and Concord, boys younger than you were dying on both sides!” Ben raised his voice. 

“That’s the price of freedom, Ben!” 

Ben scoffed. “You think Parliament is bad? Just wait until they’re mere miles from our doorstep.” 

“At least I’m taking a stand. Unlike you, who could not care less about the outcome of this conflict,” Rey retorted with a quirked eyebrow. 

Ben scoffed. “You’re right.”

The words had escaped Ben’s mouth before he could think about them. It was the first time he had said those words out loud, but he meant it. Before he could speak again, she was walking up the stairs to leave him. 

Ben retreated to the parlor and poured himself a glass of whatever liquor Mitaka had stocked in the decanter. He sat in his chair with a dramatic flop. The house was too silent now for Ben’s taste. The silence unfortunately lent itself to Ben having too much room to think. 

He’d never admitted it out loud, but he didn’t care about the outcome of the war. It was all the same. Even though he was thirty, he’d seen enough of war. At fourteen, he’d joined the British Army during the French and Indian War. He’d run away from home and lied about his age to do so. He saw a lot of the same idealism in Rey that lived in him when he began fighting for his country. She hadn’t seen the extent of General Snoke’s cruelty nor had she been forced to carry out his unjust orders. 

Ben often cringed and was kept awake at night, haunted by the lives he’d ruined. He knew how far General Snoke would go to defend the Crown. If the General found out Ben had stayed in that church and listened, the Solo’s were as good as dead. Ben sighed and took a sip from his glass. All he wanted was to retire to Virginia, but his new wife was endangering this plan at every turn. 

It was understandable why Ben would care about his own neck. However, Rey’s life should mean nothing to him. So why was Ben so invested in protecting Rey? For Ben, the most obvious answer was that maybe, just maybe on some level he cared for Rey. His mind drifted back to the scene in their bedroom on their wedding night. He had dared to think that maybe something more than friendship could bloom between them. When she had pulled away, her rejection nearly killed him, but why? 

Rey confused and confounded Ben. She raised more questions than Ben could answer. It was maddening.

Ben was so lost in his own thoughts that he barely heard the front door close. His head snapped in the direction of the noise. He got up from his seat and headed toward the stairs. There were no servants around today, so it had to be Rey. 

“Aurora?” he called up the stairs. There was no response. This wasn’t a surprise, he figured Rey wouldn’t answer him given their earlier fight. He ascended the stairs to see if she was in her bedroom. He only found that room empty as well. Not knowing whether to be frustrated or terrified, he bounded down the stairs and out the door in search of his wife. 

Ben set a brisk pace as he walked down the street, simply guessing at the direction Rey had gone. He made a series of random turns, hoping providence had guided his steps in the right direction. A thought struck him like lightning as he was halfway down a street. Remembering the square he’d found Rey when she’d ditched Mitaka, he reoriented himself and headed in that direction. 

He was nearly at his destination when he’d arrived at the very church they worshiped at hours earlier. Now, instead of peaceful congregants, Ben only found an angry mob in front of the church. Minister San Tekka was being lead out of the church by Hux, now in his red uniform, and another soldier Ben didn’t recognize. He knew this only meant one thing. 

“Ben,” Rey’s voice broke through the crowd. He didn’t know how she got here, but he was grateful that he’d found her. “They’re taking him to the gallows!” 

“I know,” Ben said, observing the scene unfolding in front of him. 

She grabbed the lapels of his jacket. “You have to do something! There’s still time, you can stop them!” 

Ben gently placed his hands on her wrists and looked in her eyes. She was silently pleading with him to fix this. Oh, how Ben wished he could fix this, but there was nothing that he could do. Whether right or wrong, Minister San Tekka had made his choices. Unfortunately, the payment for his choices was his life.

He sighed and willed the lump forming in his throat away. “I can’t, Aurora.” 

Tears were welling up in his wife’s eyes. God, how he wished he could fix this. He couldn’t say anything, but he didn’t need to. Rey just took his hand and they followed the mob and Minister San Tekka off to his fate. 

After the mob died down and dispersed after the inevitable, Ben and Rey walked home in silence. Ben was fully prepared for their second fight of the day upon arriving at his house, but no such thing happened. When they walked through the door, Ben steeled himself. Rey turned around. Her face was as white as a sheet and her eyes were glazed over. She didn’t speak, her whole body just collapsed in on itself. Ben ran over and caught her before she hit the ground. 

“Rey!” he yelled to rouse her. 

A servant ran in. “What happened?” 

“She’s fainted! Call for a doctor!” Ben cried as he felt Rey’s body burning up in his hands. 

“Nonsense,” the servant dismissed. “She’s just had too much excitement today.” 

“Get a doctor,” Ben repeated his order. 

The servant scurried off to carry out his bidding.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Lor San Tekka's sermon is based on a famous sermon from a colonial minister named John Witherspoon called["Dominion of Providence Over the Passions of Men"](https://oll.libertyfund.org/pages/1776-witherspoon-dominion-of-providence-over-the-passions-of-men-sermon). 
> 
> Come say hi on [Twitter](https://twitter.com/em_is_writing) and [Tumblr](https://www.tumblr.com/blog/em-is-writing)!


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Happy 4th of July to my American readers! Since I do have a few international readers please enjoy [this video](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yb7MI8NQLoo) on the Declaration of Independence and why July 4th is a holiday for us. 
> 
> I'm so sorry it's taken me forever to update this, but please enjoy this extra-long chapter as an apology.

_ What is taking the doctor so long?  _ This was Ben’s constant refrain after Rey had collapsed. 

 

If Ben had the presence of mind to look at a clock, he would see it had been only about fifteen  minutes since the servant had run to get doctor. He thought the floorboards would give out from under him as he paced back and forth in his bedroom. Well, he supposed it was Rey’s bedroom now, being he hadn’t slept in that bed since before their wedding night. However, none of that mattered at this point. 

 

Rey hadn’t really woken up since fainting. She had opened her eyes here and there, and turned over in bed once or twice. 

 

Fatalistic thoughts began to seep into Ben’s mind. What if Rey never recovered? The thought of that was too much to bear. 

 

Ben couldn’t fathom this being the end. He didn’t know if he could face a day without Rey’s tenacious spirit. That thought gave him pause. Rey hadn’t been in his life all that long, so why did the thought of losing her affect him so? Why was he fearful at the thought of his future in Virginia with Rey slipping away? 

 

Could it be that he cared for Rey? He dismissed this thought quickly. The last words that had been spoken between them were in anger. These were hardly the actions of people who care about each other. Ben was simply concerned for her safety. Nothing more. Nothing less. He’d pulled her back from the brink of danger more than a few times. That was simply to keep her alive and that was all. 

 

The passion and fire he felt in their kiss on their wedding night was of little consequence. They were both swept up in the moment, he rationalized. There was no way a deeper bond could possibly be forming, was there? 

 

Ben did not want to think of the implications of a deeper bond forming between them. It was surely one-sided. Rey had made it clear to him she wanted nothing to do with this arrangement. That revelation cut Ben someplace deep in his soul he never knew existed. Why could he not bear the fact that Rey didn’t feel anything for him? He needed to stop himself before this spiraled out of control. 

 

Fortunately, the doctor had arrived at that very moment and snapped Ben out of his thoughts. A man of about fifty years with greying hair and a face full of wisdom entered Organa Manor. 

 

“Good afternoon,” the doctor greeted with a tip of his hat. “I’m Doctor Galen Erso.” 

 

“Thank you for coming doctor,” Ben nodded. “I pray you can figure out what’s wrong with my wife.” 

 

Dr. Erso offered Ben a kind smile. “Let me assess her and I’ll make my recommendations.” 

 

He made quick work of assessing Rey, and Ben tried to keep his composure while the doctor worked on her. Ben paced back and forth a few times during the examination and waited for the doctor to speak. 

 

After a long silence, Dr. Erso turned to Ben with a hum. “It’s influenza.” 

 

Ben released a breath he didn’t realize he was holding.  _ Influenza _ . It wasn’t the worst diagnosis he could hear, but still a dangerous one. “What can be done?” 

 

“I’m going to give her a poultice for the fever and infection. If her symptoms don’t improve by tomorrow, send for me again. Also, have a servant bathe her with cold water.” 

 

Ben nodded and the doctor applied the treatment to Rey’s chest, placing a cloth to keep it in place.

After the doctor left, Ben couldn’t help but stand next to the bedside and stare at Rey’s sleeping form. A well meaning servant brought a chair close to the side of the bed and instructed Ben to sit. 

 

He complied and continued to stare. For the first time in his life, Ben Solo began to pray unprompted. He also began bargaining with God. He didn’t have much to offer, but he offered it. 

 

For a moment, Ben thought God had heard his pleas. Rey opened her eyes with a moan and looked directly at Ben. He jolted from his spot in the chair where he had decided to keep vigil. 

 

He grabbed her hand. “Sweetheart, are you alright?” 

 

If Ben had all of his wits about him, he might question why the word “sweetheart” fell from his lips. However, he didn’t entertain such thoughts at the moment. His thoughts only centered on Rey’s well-being. 

 

“Ben,” she moaned weakly. 

 

“I’m here, Aurora,” he squeezed her hand. 

 

“Ben,” she repeated and closed her eyes yet again. 

 

He swallowed the lump in his throat and willed the tears that were forming to stop. She was back to her catatonic state. Reducing himself to a ball of emotions would do Rey and him no good. It wouldn’t will Rey back to health and that was of utmost importance.

 

As if by divine providence, a female servant came to bathe Rey in accordance with Dr. Erso’s instructions. She shoo’ed him out of the room to begin her work and Ben was more than happy to oblige. 

 

Ben mused that he should probably send word to Poe that his sister was poorly. While his servant was tending to Rey, he went to his study and scribbled a letter to his brother-in-law. He sent Mitaka to Long Island with all haste. 

 

The next two days, Ben fell into a routine. He woke and took his breakfast. Over breakfast, he would read his daily correspondence from General Snoke of troop movements and the like. After a half-hearted reading of his superior’s letters, he’d go see to Rey’s needs. 

 

He didn’t know if Rey could hear him, but he’d taken to reading to her. The house was too big and too quiet while she battled this illness. He ached for her laughter with the servants to fill the halls again. He missed her witty replies, which kept him on his toes. His reading to her was mainly to keep his wits about him in the quiet hours he would sit by her bedside. 

 

On the second day in the late afternoon, Mitaka returned from Long Island. He stood in the doorway of Ben’s bedroom where he was reading a passage from  _ Pamela; or Virture Rewarded  _ to Rey. He cleared his throat to announce his presence. Ben turned in his seat to greet his secretary. He might have been scandalized by his secretary catching him reading such a novel, but it was Rey’s favorite book and he couldn’t bring himself to care. 

 

“Dopheld,” he said with a nod. “I trust your journey went well.” 

 

“Very well, indeed,” he replied. He turned to his traveling companion. “May I present, Mrs. Kaydel Dameron. She insisted on joining me when she heard of your wife’s condition.”  

 

“Good day to you, Colonel Solo,” Kaydel greeted with a nod as she stood in the doorway. 

 

“Good day, Mrs. Dameron. I trust you had a pleasant journey as well.” 

 

“Quite, Colonel Solo,” her eyes flitted over to Rey. “How does my sister-in-law fare?” 

 

“Better since yesterday. She opens her eyes for longer, but she only speaks in moans and grunts.” 

 

“I see, I shall write my husband and tell him to keep praying for her swift recovery,” Kaydel replied. “While she is still ill, I came to offer my services as nursemaid and allow you and your staff some respite.” 

 

“You are most kind,” Ben mustered a smile. “I believe one of my servants is preparing her a poultice right now. You might be of use there.” 

 

Kaydel removed her straw hat, nodded, and moved toward the kitchen to see if she could be of assistance. 

 

The more he sat and was with his thoughts, the worse it became. Ben knew he couldn’t stay in his room anymore keeping vigil. He looked out the window. It seemed a very pleasant late summer evening outside. The birds were whistling their merry tunes. It was then Ben decided a walk through the small garden on his estate would do him good. 

 

He meandered—more like paced in circles—a while through the garden. The heady floral scent of his surroundings often soothed him. He normally wandered around the garden to relax and settle his mind. This evening was different. His walk tonight did little to help his state of mind. The acid in his stomach churned at the turn of events of the past few days. It was the first time since Dr. Erso’s visit he’d been able to take internal stock. Not that he allowed himself to take stock of his feelings often. 

 

Funny, he mused, his frequent introspection only began when a hurricane with chestnut hair entered his life. Now that very hurricane was opening him up to a world of feelings he’d never allowed himself to feel before. It was all very strange, new and terrifying. 

 

He didn’t know what this could all mean. The possibility that he might care for Rey once again flashed across his mind. To be sure, he cared about Rey, but this felt deeper than that. He’d never felt this way about anyone in...ever. As he sat on a stone bench in the garden, a tidal wave of emotions swept over him. 

 

A word crept into his mind. One that Ben didn’t think he was capable of.  _ Love _ . Was that what he was feeling? Did he  _ love _ Rey? His life up until this point hadn’t allowed for such a luxury. He scoffed at that term. What kind of life had he lead that love would be considered a luxury? A life under Snoke is what. 

 

Snoke frowned upon connections of any sort. He said it made his men weak. If love was what Ben was feeling, he had to disagree with his commander’s assessment. It had given him purpose. Wasn’t that all everyone wanted in this life? 

 

“Colonel Solo,” Kaydel’s voice interrupted his thoughts. “I’m sorry, I didn’t see you in the garden. I’ll take my leave.” 

 

She was standing on the path opposite from where Ben had come. She folded her hands, gave Ben a deferential nod and turned to leave. 

 

“Mrs. Dameron, I would be glad of the company.” 

 

Kaydel offered him a smile and took a seat next to him on the bench. 

 

“How are you finding the accomodations here, Mrs. Dameron?” Ben asked, making small talk. 

 

“Very well thank you,” Kaydel began. “Thank you for your hospitality.” 

 

“Think nothing of it,” Ben replied. “However, I must confess I was surprised when you turned up to see after my wife’s condition in the place of your husband.” 

 

“I was eager to leave my home,” Kaydel said rather quickly. She appeared to regret the words the moment she spoke them. “Forgive me, that was forward.” 

 

“Pay it no mind,” Ben said. “An unhappy marriage can be a trying thing to bear.” 

 

“It’s not an  _ unhappy _ marriage,” Kaydel pressed her hands on her skirt. “It...it isn’t much of a marriage at all. My husband is more interested in keeping...other company in his bed than me. I’m sure you’ve heard rumors.” 

 

A blush of red crept across her face. 

 

“I apologize,” Kaydel replied, shaking her head. “I don’t know why I’m unburdening myself to you. Maybe I’m only unburdening myself to you because we both find ourselves in situations where our marriages are little more than name only,” Kaydel offered. 

 

Ben considered her words for a second.  _ Was it?  _

 

Kaydel mistook his silence for impertinence. “I’m sorry, yet again. I keep forgetting myself…” 

 

“It’s quite ok,” Ben said. “My mind is troubled with other matters. That’s why I was silent.” 

 

“What troubles you, Colonel?” 

 

Despite the fact Ben had listened to Kaydel’s troubles, he couldn’t bring himself to tell her of his errant thoughts. Especially when he didn’t know what to make of them himself. His nervous energy compelled him to stand and pace in front of the bench. His eyes fell to some nearby roses. 

 

“Let’s day you were given some roses, Mrs. Dameron. You didn’t expect the roses to bloom, take root or take hold in the soil. However, against all odds, all reason, the roses bloomed and took hold in the soil. You don’t know what to do about the roses now that they’re blooming, but you can’t stop thinking about them.” 

 

Kaydel watched him with a keen eye, noting that his eyes often flitted up to his bedroom window. “You think the roses are in danger of dying?” 

 

Ben was thankful Kaydel had picked up on his hidden meaning. “The thought had crossed my mind once or twice.” 

 

Kaydel hummed. “Are you afraid of the fact the roses are taking root?” 

 

“It scares me witless,” he breathed. 

 

Kaydel paused another beat. “I say roses blooming, flowering and taking root are never a bad thing. It’s a thing of beauty to behold, a rose. Never be afraid of the beauty in this world, Colonel.” 

 

Ben sighed. “There seems little beauty to behold in the world today.” 

 

“I haven’t found a rose to take root in my own life, but I hold on to hope it will root and bloom one day.” 

 

“I admire your optimism, Mrs. Dameron.” 

 

She offered him a kind smile in return. 

 

Ben drew in a breath. All of this was new, confusing, and difficult to navigate. Warfare was easy—there were rules of engagement, which were easy to understand. Matters of the heart and love were far more complicated. 

 

If Rey recovered, Ben could parse his next steps, but beyond that, he couldn’t think. 

 

As if God had read his thoughts, a servant ran out of the house at that very moment. 

 

“Colonel Solo!” she exclaimed. “You better come quick! Mrs. Solo is awake! She’s asking for you.”

  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The book that Ben is reading to Rey while she's ill is actually a real book! More info [here](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pamela;_or,_Virtue_Rewarded). It's a story of seduction and class warfare and I think Colonial! Rey would really dig it. 
> 
> [My Twitter](https://twitter.com/em_is_writing)
> 
> [My Tumblr](https://www.tumblr.com/blog/em-is-writing)


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sorry it's been a hot minute since I've updated this, but please enjoy this extra long chapter! Many thanks to JenfysNest for beta'ing.

Rey’s eyes fluttered open. A sheen of sweat covered her skin and a smell she couldn’t quite place hit her nostrils. She let out a brief groan as she turned her head to the window. That proved a difficult chore. Every muscle in her body ached and felt weak all at the same time. 

 

She remembered falling into her husband’s arms, but that’s where her memory stopped. Everything else is a foggy haze. She began to swing her legs over the bed in an attempt to sit up, gain her bearings. A well-meaning servant entering the room stopped this. 

 

“Now, don’t get up Miss!” she said as she scurried into the room. 

 

Rey opened her mouth to speak as the servant helped her sit up in bed, but all she could manage to squeak out in a raspy voice was “Ben”. 

 

The servant handed her a cup of water. “It’s alright, Lady Solo, I’ll go get the Colonel at once!”

 

Foggy memories started playing in Rey’s mind while she waited. She can’t make sense of them. A faint whisper of Ben reading some familiar words seeped into her mind. She doesn’t understand. Her husband wouldn’t be doing that. Would he? 

 

She shook her head and decided to concentrate on the things she  _ can  _ make sense of. Rey remembered fainting into her husband’s arms. Judging by the sun setting outside, she gathered that she must have hit her head and slept the day away. Her head didn’t hurt at the moment, but that’s another thing she decided to parse out later. 

 

A creaking floorboard from outside the room demanded her attention. It was Ben. He shifted awkwardly in the doorframe. 

 

Silence reigned in the room. He was looking at Rey strangely. It wasn’t his usual smug smirk, nor the look of lust that had driven her own desires on their wedding night. It was something different. Something soft. 

 

Rey couldn’t place it and she’d had enough mysteries for the day. 

 

“What happened to me?” she asked. 

 

Ben took this as an invitation to enter the room. “You had influenza, Aurora.” 

 

Rey nodded her head in understanding. It was coming back to her in bits and pieces at the moment. She remembered feeling strange before heading to church that morning.  _ Was it still Sunday?  _

 

She furrowed her brow and tried to figure it out. After a few moments, she decided she couldn’t. “What day is it?” 

 

“It’s Wednesday evening,” he replied evenly. 

 

Rey scoffed in amazement and Ben offered her a small smile in response. 

 

A silence descended upon the room again. This was new. A few days ago, they could barely go a few minutes without sniping at each other. How had things changed so drastically while Rey was effectively dead to the world?

 

Rey sighed, figuring things would become clearer as she got better. 

 

“Are you hungry?” Ben asked. 

 

Rey stomach growled, effectively answering Ben’s question. She nodded. He offered an awkward bow and went, presumably, in search of some food. 

 

The same servant who’d fetched Ben earlier returned with some bread and cheese on a tray. Rey tore into the food with abandon, not realizing how hungry she was until taking the first bite. In between her ravenous bites, she heard light footsteps approaching her room. 

 

“It does me good to see your illness has not dampened your appetite.” 

 

Rey looked up and saw Kaydel standing in the doorway. She simply offered a smile in greeting around a mouthful of bread and cheese. 

 

Kaydel laughed and shook her head. 

 

“Dear Kaydel,” Rey managed after gulping down her food. “Thank you for coming to look after me.”

 

“Think nothing of it,” Kaydel said crossing the room to come sit in the chair at Rey’s bedside. 

 

“It must have been  _ such  _ an imposition to leave my brother’s house,” Rey said jokingly. 

 

Kaydel chuckled and moved a book off the chair. “Truly, Rey, think nothing of it.” 

 

Rey smiled. “You’re too humble for your own good, Kaydel Dameron.” 

 

Kaydel shook her head with a smile. “It’s not humility on my part. I tell you the truth when I say your husband has cared tirelessly for you these three days.” 

 

“My husband?” Rey scoffed. “A man who harbors nothing but contempt for me?” 

 

Kaydel paused for a moment and pursed her lips together. Rey sensed she was about to choose her next words carefully. “If I were you, I would not say those words with such certainty. When I came, he hadn’t left your bedside. From what I observed, he barely took any food or slept in the three days you were ill.” 

 

This rendered Rey speechless. She didn’t know how this could be possible. Having given the Colonel nothing but cold looks and harsh words, she expected nothing but that in return. This was not how she was raised and it shamed her. Kaydel’s report of her husband’s tenderness moved her as well. A smile crept across her face as she mulled this over. Perhaps Colonel Benjamin Solo wasn’t who she first thought him to be. 

 

Perhaps this conflict raging around them wasn’t as black and white as Rey thought it to be. In her estimation a good man looked after his wife and saw that his household had what it needed. Ben had kept watch over her, made sure she received proper care, despite their differing viewpoints. 

 

Rey had to force herself to stop thinking about this. The residual effects of her sickness, coupled with the use of brain power to piece everything together was making her dizzy. 

 

A few slow breaths stopped the room from spinning. Rey opened her eyes.

 

“My apologies, Aurora, I didn’t mean to overwhelm you,” Kaydel said, placing a reassuring hand on her arm. 

 

“Think nothing of it,” Rey replied, offering the best smile she could. 

 

“I’ll take my leave now and let you get some rest,” Kaydel nodded. 

 

“I, again, must express my gratitude for coming to look after me,” Rey reiterated as Kaydel stood up to leave the room. 

 

“Dearest, save your gratitude for your husband.” 

 

With that, Kaydel left the room. As her footsteps retreated, Rey looked over to a table close to the bed. She saw the usual items—the porcelain washbasin, pitcher, and towel, but an out-of-place item caught Rey’s attention. A book. A gasp escaped her lips. 

 

It wasn’t a dream nor a delusion brought on by fever. Her husband’s kindness had not been imagined, but what had she done to deserve it? She had given him no reason or inclination. As if summoned by the power of her mind, the very object of her thoughts entered the room. 

 

“Mrs. Dameron said she left you because you were poorly. Can I do anything to alleviate your discomfort?” 

 

“Thank you, husband, but I just grew faint for a few moments. All is well now.” 

 

Despite the fact that Rey had been alone with her husband many times before, a new feeling of unease now reigned in her stomach. She attempted to quickly take stock of it. It wasn’t an unpleasant feeling, which baffled her even further. It didn’t hold the same unease as fear. No, this was something different. Every fiber of her body was on fire. What was happening to her? 

 

“Shall I read to you, Aurora?” he asked as he began to light some candles. 

 

She nodded. “But husband, we are married. You may call me Rey.” 

 

A smile threatened to escape her husband’s body upon hearing that. He worked his jaw, grabbed the book, and sat down in the chair at her bedside. Ben opened to the page where he left off and began reading. Rey closed her eyes. She’d never noticed it before, but her husband’s voice was quite soothing—silky and baritone, washing over her like a fine liquor. Her hands relaxed at her sides and she released a deep breath. 

 

The relaxation Rey felt, was soon interrupted when she felt a brush of something up against her hand. Her eyes jolted open and she saw that her fingers were almost laced with Ben’s. He noticed at about the same time. His breath hitched and he stopped reading. 

Their eyes met and the only sound in the room was the flickering of candles, and crickets outside beginning their nightly symphony. Rey’s fingers curled around her husband’s of their own volition, but she wasn’t about to protest her own body’s movements. 

 

It felt  _ right _ . Why? The reason, strangely, didn’t matter right now. It was enough just to be in this moment, with the sun almost completely gone for the day and her husband reading her favorite book to her. She could think deep thoughts and analyze motives later. Right now, she was just content to be. 

 

***

 

The next day, Rey was strong enough for a walk in the garden. She was glad of this. Even though she had only been awake for about twelve hours of it, the four days she’d spent in bed made her restless. After a hearty breakfast in bed, she dressed, with much fussing over from the servants. Rey tried to keep her face neutral, but to no avail. One of the servants helping her dress remarked that she must be feeling better because her eyes hadn’t stopped rolling since they entered the room. 

 

The older servant attending to Rey was adamant that Rey wouldn’t be going anywhere if she couldn’t make it down the stairs. It proved to be a bit more challenging of a task than before Rey took ill, but she managed it—shooting the eldest servant a look of satisfaction when she did. Kaydel mercifully sensed Rey’s annoyance with the well-meaning servants and dismissed them, stating she would take over for them. Rey and Kaydel took a turn in the garden. 

 

Rey shared a little about her new life in New York City and Kaydel filled Rey in on the gossip she was missing back on Long Island. It was comforting to hear the same old petty feuds and prejudices were still alive and well. Despite the turmoil in the colonies, things were still the same. They continued to share gossip until they were interrupted by Colonel Solo’s secretary, Dopheld Mitaka, entering the garden.  

 

Rey noted that he stood straighter than usual upon seeing the women. His eyes never strayed from Kaydel.  _ Curious _ , Rey thought. She looked toward Kaydel. Her cheeks were flushed and her eyes were averted toward the ground.  _ Even more curious _ , Rey pondered. 

 

“Good morning, Mr. Mitaka,” Rey greeted as he drew closer. 

 

“Good day, ladies,” he replied when he had reached where the women were standing. He immediately turned toward Kaydel and regarded her with a nod. “Fine morning, Mrs. Dameron.” 

 

She offered him a coy smile, but had trouble meeting his gaze. “Indeed, Mr. Mitaka.” 

 

“Will...will you dine with me again tonight?” 

 

A small gasp left Kaydel’s body. “I-I should like nothing more than to dine with you again tonight.” 

 

“Very well.” 

 

Rey’s eyes flew back and forth between the pair. She obviously missed something and is now fully prepared to interrogate her sister-in-law once Mr. Mitaka is out of ear shot. They exchange pleasant goodbyes and Mitaka heads into the house. 

 

When Rey is certain they are alone, she grabs Kaydel’s arm with a little more force than necessary. “Kaydel Ko Dameron, what is going on?!” Rey immediately regretted coming on too strong in her questioning because Kaydel looked mere moments from tears. “I-I’m sorry, Kaydel, I didn’t mean…”

 

“Please,” Kaydel plead with Rey, “please don’t tell Poe…” 

 

“Have you…?” Rey questioned, attempting as best she can to be discreet. 

 

Kaydel, not looking up from the ground, nodded very timidly. “I haven’t known a man...ever. You know the circumstances of me marrying your brother—I was 22, the word ‘spinster’ was being thrown around, and your brother being...your brother...we were thrust together. I began talking with Dopheld while you were ill and he was just so _kind_ and I felt like I was heard for the first time. _Ever_. And…” 

 

“Kaydel,” Rey placed a reassuring hand on her shoulder. 

 

Kaydel took a breath, but didn’t stop talking. “Also, three in a marriage is very crowded.” 

 

“Finn,” Rey said, giving voice to her sister-in-law’s thoughts. 

 

Kaydel nodded. “I don’t fault him that, you know.” 

 

Rey’s heart ached for Kaydel as she offered her a sympathetic smile. When she came to New York City a few weeks ago what she most feared was a husband who was cold and inattentive to her needs. Her brother was a good and honorable man, but he was terrible at being a husband. Rey didn’t know whether to lay the blame at his feet or the way society had conditioned him to be. The stark contrast with her own marriage made her even more confused. Whatever the reasons, Rey couldn’t fault her sister-in-law for seeking comfort in the arms of another—even though adultery was a sin. 

 

Rey looped an arm through Kaydel’s arm. “I will not breathe a word of this to my brother.” 

 

Kaydel sighed in relief. “Thank you.”

 

***

 

Later that evening, Rey decided that another walk in the garden was needed. The sunshine and fresh air had done her good. She needed more—never mind the servants warnings that she shouldn’t go outside alone. Bringing the book Ben read to her the night before, she found a bench and picked up where he had left off. 

 

A smile crept over her face at the memory from last night. She was still caught up in the fog of fever during the moment, but time had allowed a certain clarity and perspective. The moment was intimate and very much what the storybooks and poems had told Rey love would be like. The last vestiges of Rey’s pride, however, won’t let her continue that line of thought. To continue would be to admit defeat. She’s not ready for that yet.  

 

The gods, however, continued to scoff at Rey. Her husband came into the garden looking for her almost at that very moment. The uneasy feeling from the night before returned as they greeted one another and he stood next to the bench. 

 

“Enjoying your reading?” he questioned politely. 

 

“Quite,” she smiled up at him. “Although, I think I liked it better when it was you who was reading the words to me.” 

 

Her brain begged her to stop speaking to him in such an inviting manner, but he smirked back at her and all hope was lost. “I’ve been told my voice has a certain...quality.” 

 

Rey laughed and stood to join him. Ben took her book, like the gentleman he was, and they began walking down the same garden lane she and Kaydel had taken this morning. 

 

“Do you think God is laughing at us right now?” Ben asked. 

 

_ What a strange question _ , Rey thought as she chuckled. “I’m afraid you’ve lost me, dear husband.” 

 

Ben hummed. “What I mean to say is, I think he laughs at seeing people as dissimilar as us, getting along in harmony.” 

 

“On the contrary, I think it warms His heart.” 

 

“I suppose if people with such differing views as you and I…,” Ben began.

 

Rey quickly became defensive. Something primal rose up in her, ready to defend the worthiness of her beliefs, yet again. “I can’t give up my views and you know it. It’s the one thing in my life where I have a choice!” 

 

Ben smiled. His chest shook in silent laughter and his hands raised up in surrender. “Nor would I ask you to.” He drew closer to her, yet her body relaxed in spite of this.  _ Strange _ . “Truly it’s one of the things I have great affection for about you.” 

 

“Anything else you have great affection for about me, Colonel?” Rey teased. 

 

The smile faded from his face. His gaze deepened and bored into her. It was almost as if he wanted to say something—as if it was on the tip of his tongue, but something was preventing him from actually speaking. It was baffling to Rey. She looked away from his intense gaze and swallowed—her throat having become suspiciously dry in the past few moments. She cleared her throat and hummed. “Choice. Must be nice to have that as a man.”

 

Ben scoffed. “Choice—doesn’t seem like I possess much of that in my life.” 

 

“On the contrary,” Rey began, “you chose your occupation, forged your own way…”

 

Ben scoffed. “Mainly driven by spite.”      

 

Rey smiled and sighed and considered that her husband might be right, that choice was just an illusion—a trick of the gods for their amusement as mere mortals struggled in vain against it. She looked back at her husband. He was trying to say something yet again, this time he was able to force words out. 

 

“For...all the times I’ve regretted when choice was taken from me, there’s been but one time I haven’t lamented the lack of choice, for it brought me exactly what I didn’t even know I desired.” 

 

His tone was far too serious, his gaze far too intense as he pushed a lock of hair behind her ear. It was all too much for Rey. He couldn’t possibly be referring to her.  _ Desire _ was far too serious a word to describe where their marriage was. He wasn’t referring to her. At all. She turned her back toward her husband and took a few nervous steps away from him. “Your military career, naturally.” 

 

With her back to him, she missed a look of disappointment that swept over his face at her words. “Naturally.” 

 

A quiet descended over the garden, save for the crunching of gravel under Colonel Solo’s footsteps. He caught up with her in short order and grabbed her wrist. He took her other hand, clasping both of her smaller hands in his. His breathing was ragged, but he hadn’t exerted himself greatly. 

 

“Rey,” he breathed. 

 

Suddenly, the revelation hit Rey like a wave upon the shore with that one breath. The force she’d been struggling against finally has a name. A warmth bloomed in her chest and her stomach all at once. The heaving in her chest grew stronger the more she thought about it. 

 

_ Helpless _ . That’s the first coherent thought she can form as a smile spread across her face. Rey knows she’s helpless against this force. She can’t fight anymore. No one can fight against it. She’s resigned, as she’s finally given a name to her feelings toward Colonel Solo and an explanation for his actions. 

 

_ Love _ . 

 

Damn her. She had to go and fall in love with her husband. 

 

“Yes?” she responded, just as breathless as Ben. 

 

“I..,” he stammered. Words seemed to fail him, so he let his actions speak for him. He cupped her face in his hand—the warmth of it pleasant and soothing on her face. The space between their bodies grew smaller. Rey’s body thrummed with the anticipation of a kiss. It had not forgotten the searing kiss shared in their bed on their wedding night. She had secretly ached for more, but dared not admit it. Ben slipped his other hand around her waist and pulled her in, leaving no space between them. Rey inhaled, not wanting to forget this moment. 

 

“Colonel Solo!” a voice called out through the summer evening. 

 

Rey sighed and her forehead fell on Ben’s chest. Hurried footsteps came closer and Rey turned her head toward the source of the sound. It was Mitaka, holding a letter. Ben still held her in their embrace as he reached for the letter. His face fell as he read it’s contents. His face told Rey everything that was in the letter. 

 

“It’s from General Snoke,” Ben sighed. “My regiment’s been called up.”

  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

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**Author's Note:**

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